So I took a break over the weekend to attend a local book club. I’m friends with one of the members because - let’s be honest here - she likes my books. (What, I’m going to attend a book club where they don’t?) I actually met LeAnne when she carted TSoS up to the register at Borders while I was standing there with “the Cadillac of strollers” and signing books. So after getting the rest of the girls to read my latest (Reading the book is not actually a requirement for this bookclub. Being able to hold your own on a playdate and in a dive bar is) and promising me there’d be mixed drinks, I dropped by their latest meeting.
And by “meeting” I mean to say, “What the hell?”
Because at one point, after a drink or three, I said, “Look, are you guys ever going to talk about my books?”
They said no, and we moved on to more important things. Like:
*Lill knows definitively who killed JFK, but she’s mostly keeping her trap shut about it, so don’t come after her if you’re worried about the truth getting out. (And if you do, she’s second from right in the picture below, not the one in the middle. That’s me.)
*The classic ‘dog-ear book pages or not?’ debate. This was divided, and some people seemed to play favorites with hardcovers. I’m very right-wing about my book use, and not opposed to banging the b*stards against the wall if I feel like it, but I’m also tolerant of those with more exacting standards. As we all liked one another, we declared it a draw.
*LeAnne asked that I inform Harper that my books aren’t terribly well bound. For instance, she was holding SCENT when she fell off her floatie and into the pool, and then left it out in 100 degree heat and the damned binding fell apart, making it hard to read. So I’m here to say, Work on it, Harper! These harsh elements aren’t going anywhere soon!
*Republicans should never, under any circumstance, get laid. This was almost unanimous. (Don’t worry, LeAnne. They’ll never find that body.)
*Keri reads the most of all of us: 4-5 books a week. B*tch has my life.
*I need more sex in my books. (I did not get to vote in this matter.)
*If you want to wear it, you know it’s good champagne. (This is book related because I’m going to put it in one.)
*LeAnne is the queen of the dead. She can tell you everyone who has died recently. Or ever.
*Though some book club members have clung to their classic Catholic guilt, most of us would become Pastafarians (Worshippers of The Flying Spaghetti Monster) if pressed.
*Owning your own business while raising four kids really cuts into your reading time. (Note, Anje, I didn’t say “Boy, you have your hands full!”)
Unfortunately we all had to go home before we drank ourselves sober - a Vegas girl hazard - but we’ll meet again soon for the Haunted Vegas tour.
Thank you, ladies, for the invite, the much needed break, and the laughs.
(BTW, I know it looks like I have to goto the bathroom in the pic below, but I’m really just wringing my hands. I was tired, and pulling on body parts to stay awake.)
